Creative Counterpart

by Linda Dillow

This book comes highly recommended by many pastors and church leaders. Even though Creative Counterpart offers a considerable amount of solid Biblical teaching concerning the "Proverbs 31 woman," there is also a considerable amount of unbiblical teaching that has drawn upon the concepts and teachings of humanistic psychology. Below are listed some of the quotes and comments that detail these concerns:

-  Dillow quotes the Lee Harvey Oswald account, from James Dobson's book Hide or Seek, of the reason for Oswald's alleged assassination of John F. Kennedy; Dillow agrees with Dobson that Oswald was not responsible for his actions (victim approach) because of his wife's attitude and treatment of him (instead of the Biblical approach of focusing on Oswald's sinful response to his wife, for which he is fully and totally responsible) (pp. 104-106).

-  Dillow attests to the validity of Maslow's need hierarchy; Dillow agrees with what psychiatrists say about "man's most basic needs ... approval and admiration. In our society there is an epidemic of inferiority. Many of the marriage problems ... are related to a bad self-image" (p. 106). (Emphasis added.)

-  Dillow tells wives how to build-up their husband's self-image and attests to the concept of a healthy self-image (p.107).

-  Dillow contends that a husband's self-image is directly related to the wife's 'stroking' of him; wife should even "glorify her husband" to enhance "his image of himself" (p. 107). (Emphasis added.)

-  Dillow confuses "needs" with "desires," and encourages blame-shifting rather than accepting responsibility for one's own sinful responses (p. 108).

-  Poor exegesis of Eph. 5 -- interpreted by Dillow as an instruction for building husband's self-image (p.110).

-  Dillow subscribes to a theology of unconditional acceptance with "no condition of change" required (p.111).

-  Psychological responses; erroneous theology concerning "unconditional acceptance" (p. 165).

-  Dillow relies on psychological systems of motivation rather than the Biblical one laid-out for believers in Romans 7 (pp. 191-192).

-  Dillow discusses a man's so-called "psychological needs of acceptance and love" (p. 193). (Emphasis added.)

-  "Accepting yourself" is put forward by Dillow as one of "the three essential ingredients in a happy marriage" (p. 205). (Emphasis added.)

-  Books, footnotes, and recommended readings by Dillow (pp. 203, 216):

(a) Dobson, Hide or Seek: How to Build up Your Child's Self-Esteem
(b) Morgan, The Total Woman (heavily self-esteem oriented)
(c) LaHaye, The Act of Marriage

Biblical Discernment Ministries - Revised 8/90