Xmas Song Parodies

(Protestant Christ-Mass Carols)


Song Words 1995 by James Dodson
Permission granted to use freely with our without acknowledgement.


God Keep All of You Protestants
(To the tune of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen")

God keep all of you Protestants
From walking in the way;
Of heathens and idolaters
To celebrate this day.
You resurrect this Romish mass
For you have gone astray.
O, I know that it's just a popish ploy,
Popish ploy,
Yes, I know that it's just a popish ploy.

You celebrate the birth of Christ
Though God did not command;
This service of idolatry
Is from an evil hand.
You wed the devil to the Son
When Christ-Mass you demand.
O, I know that it's just a popish ploy,
Popish ploy,
Yes, I know that it's
just a popish ploy.


That Little Town the Vatican
(To the tune of "O Little Town of Bethlehem")

That little town the Vatican,
How well it tells a lie;
To lull you into hellish sleep,
Idolatry to ply.
Their net of darkness closes,
O, Protestant to snare;
Your soul to popish wickedness,
Your mind their lies to bear.


Banish Christmas
(To the tune of "The Chestnut Song")


Servetus roasting in an open fire
John Knox preaching where he can;
Calvin teaching against every sin
The folk all look so Puritan.
Everybody knows idolatry is wickedness
for papist, Protestant or Jew.
Though some people say,
They got carried away
Banish Christmas here, too!


Barks the Papist to His Friend
(To the tune of "Hark the Herald Angels Sing")

Barks the papist to his friend:
"Help us reach our wicked end.
Keep the world in superstition;
Come and help in our mission.
Let them keep our Christmas day.
'Protestants,' the pope will say,
'Come and celebrate our mass!
Help us in our wicked task!'"
Dark the day that we give in
To that wicked popish sin.


Enslave the World
(To the tune of "Joy to the World")

Enslave the world with Godless lies
And help the pope to reign;
Let every Protestant
Prepare to celebrate
And keep that popish mass,
And keep that popish mass,
And keep, and keep that popish mass.

He'll rule the world in tyranny
And make the nations bow;
They all will celebrate
This blasphemy
And keep that popish mass,
And keep that popish mass,
And keep, and keep that popish mass.

Biblical Discernment Ministries - Revised 11/2002

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